Eight days on, and the cheque I received from the HSE has still not cleared in the bank. So who has the money?

I DON’T know exactly how many shares are traded on the Irish Stock Exchange (ISEQ) every day. It could be millions or billions or gazillions. All the same to me. I failed First Commerce. But I do know that if one company wants to buy shares worth €10 million in another company the business is … Continue reading Eight days on, and the cheque I received from the HSE has still not cleared in the bank. So who has the money?

Soccer 2021. The ten things today’s players are told to do.

I have been given a highly secret document which emanated from one of the top soccer clubs in Europe. It details the ten things that the club’s players have to learn how to do if they want to have successful careers and if they want to win trophies. And here they are: 1 If you … Continue reading Soccer 2021. The ten things today’s players are told to do.

Covid has cost Ireland an extraordinary €30 billion. It has made Jeff Bezos an even more extraordinary €40 billion

IT’S probably because I’m old. And sick. And locked down. And grumpy. But I’ve just come across something that has annoyed me more than most things annoy me. Yes, I’m easily annoyed. I’m a grumpy driver and give out incessantly about people breaking the lights whether they’re in cars or on bikes or those damned … Continue reading Covid has cost Ireland an extraordinary €30 billion. It has made Jeff Bezos an even more extraordinary €40 billion

Co-commentators. It’s got so bad that when I’m listening to a match on the radio, I turn down the sound

I like to watch sport on television. I’d prefer it live. But even before Covid, my days of going to see Ireland in Lansdowne Road or Leinster in the RDS were coming to an end because of my own health difficulties. So it’s the telly for me. I love rugby. I like soccer. But both … Continue reading Co-commentators. It’s got so bad that when I’m listening to a match on the radio, I turn down the sound

Covid: Yes, there is one thing worse than politicians failing to get the message across…

It’s difficult not to spend the day thinking about Covid one way or another. In my case, it’s wondering how pretty healthy people in their 50s are being called for vaccination when I, with Stage 4 COPD, Immunocompromised and officially designated as “terminally ill,” still wait.  I hope to God they haven’t decided to simply … Continue reading Covid: Yes, there is one thing worse than politicians failing to get the message across…

It’s time to update some of our old sayings and proverbs. Because the best is yet to come. Isn’t it? Maybe it should say: The best is probably yet to come we hope.

There are traditional “laws’ and proverbs which have been around for year and years. It’s time we updated them. So here are a few that came to mind: Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. He who laughs last, didn’t get the joke. Change is … Continue reading It’s time to update some of our old sayings and proverbs. Because the best is yet to come. Isn’t it? Maybe it should say: The best is probably yet to come we hope.

Philip has gone to the palace in the sky. So who’s going to put their foot in it now?

I am baffled by the whole concept of royalty. I don’t get it. I can’t figure out why one family is adored and, indeed, funded because history says they’re royalty. In fairness, the Buckingham Palace (and Windsor Castle and Sandringham and Balmoral and Clarence House and Highgrove House and Kensington Palace and St James’s Palace … Continue reading Philip has gone to the palace in the sky. So who’s going to put their foot in it now?

I’m actually not a great man for conspiracy theories. I mean, I KNOW we went to the moon. Didn’t we?

I really don’t get it. Why does the world’s media keep talking about the “International Space Station”? Why do they keep pretending  it’s in outer space somewhere? It’s about 400 km above earth – about the same distance as it is from Dublin to, say, Allihies in West Cork and a little bit further than the … Continue reading I’m actually not a great man for conspiracy theories. I mean, I KNOW we went to the moon. Didn’t we?

Vladimir will be furious. But it’s time for the truth. I AM part of the big conspiracy.

ALL right. It’s time to come clean. I AM part of the media conspiracy. Yes indeed, I – and lots of my colleagues – regularly attend meetings with our leaders where we are briefed as to what we can, and cannot, write. And when I say “our leaders” I’m not talking about small fry like … Continue reading Vladimir will be furious. But it’s time for the truth. I AM part of the big conspiracy.

Please, please allow click-and-collect at bookshops and help to keep us all sane

Let me say first of all that I realise there probably isn’t a single group of people in the country who couldn’t make a case for special treatment, vaccination, a free pass and everything else, during this pandemic. I mean, journalists for example. Where would we be if it wasn’t for some of my colleagues … Continue reading Please, please allow click-and-collect at bookshops and help to keep us all sane