‘Twas the night before Christmas – updated for Covid Christmas 2021

Micheál is ready to lead us into Christmas. Hopefully.

If Clement Clarke Moore was writing The Night Before Christmas today, it might be a little bit different. It might even be like this!

‘Twas the week before Christmas

When all through the land

People were cancelling

Events they had planned

Christmas parties were gone,

We couldn’t find any

And the 12 pubs of Christmas

Was 11 too many

The children were lying

Awake in their beds

Afraid Santa’s visit

Would not go ahead

When all of a sudden

There arose such a clatter

That everyone went to see

What was the matter

They ran to the window

And saw a kerfuffle

Their dads thought it might be

A Cabinet reshuffle

But no, twas a fight

Between Leo and NPHET

And Micheál was trying

To get someone to ref it.

But he took charge himself

And he called them around

And as he said their names

There was barely a sound

NOW HOLOHAN, GLYNN,

LUKE O’NEILL AND DE CASCUN

MCCONKEY AND REID

OVER HERE WITH YOUR MASKS ON

The snow started falling

And Micheál’s head glistened

And when he started speaking

Each one of then listened.

He said people are angry,

They think we’re all messin’

Changing the rules

And leavin’ them guessin’

It’s Christmas, he said,

And Santa is comin’

Then Luke O’Neill stood

And he started hummin’

Everyone smiled

And they all started singing

Soon they could hear

All the Christmas bells ringing

Micheál looked much happier

Then he started to speak

Do you guys not know

That we’re in Christmas week?

So stop all ye’re whingin’

And blamin’ each other

For just a few days

Let’s pretend we’re all brothers

And Suddenly Micheál

Was off on his way

But he stopped,

Because he had

One more thing to say

And we heard him exclaim,

As he drove out of sight

Happy Christmas to all

And to all a good night

(Nonsense I know. But I AM proud of the appropriate DeGascun rhyme!!!)

2 thoughts on “‘Twas the night before Christmas – updated for Covid Christmas 2021

  1. eanna brophy

    Feckin’ brilliant, Paddy! The De Gascun rhyme was inspired.
    It reminds me that I’m still trying to track down one I wrote for the SP many many years ago when Jack Lynch was Taoiseach. It was called “A Visit From St Jack”, and that’s all I can remember – except the 2 opening lines of which I was equally proud:
    “‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the constituency
    Not a creature was stirring, not even an opposition TD” ….

    Sin é.

    Éanna

    Like

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