The world is going to end when nobody is allowed to say or do anything at all in case it causes offence…

I thought we had lost our way when I read that some theatres in London have banned the use of the words “ladies and gentlemen” in case they offend those of other genders.

Then I read that some universities in England no longer permit clapping because they believe the noise made by people clapping could cause anxiety in others. Clapping has been replaced with “jazz hands” where you make the same gestures but the hands pass over each other instead of meeting.

There is a long, long list of things that make me think that the world won’t end with a flood or a fire or a nuclear bomb or even when Trump does something even more insane than he has already done and causes the planet to blow up.

No. We will end because of snowflakes, the “woke” generation, the people who wake up every morning not wondering how they will be offended, but hoping they will.

It is getting worse every day.

Take this story.

Alison Birch, who runs AJ’s Unisex hair salon in Stroud, Gloucestershire was amazed when an official at the local job centre said she could not stipulate happiness as a required quality for a new employee.
Her ad said ‘Part time fully qualified hairdresser, must be confident in barbering as well as all aspects of hairdressing, must have at least 5 years experience working in a salon, after being fully qualified. This is a busy friendly small salon, so only happy, friendly stylist need apply.’

Can you see the problem?

Well, neither could I.

But when she tried to place the ad, the was told she couldn’t because it contained a discriminatory word.

She didn’t understand.

Then they guy at the job centre explained.

“You said it was a happy salon and only happy people should apply.”

She said she still didn’t get it.

So he explained more.

“I’m sorry but the word ‘happy’ is a discriminatory word and we aren’t allowed to use it. I can read you the rules on discrimination if you like. But it’s a long document. Shall we change the word in case someone thinks they can’t apply for the job because they are not a happy person?”

Alison protested. “But I only want happy people.”

He came back again. “As I said it is a discriminatory word and you are not allowed to use it, someone who is not happy will be discriminated against.”

I don’t know how the call ended. But I believe that a sufficient number of happy people applied and Alison filled her vacancy.

Personally, I think she should have told the guy at the job centre that she had revised the ad and taken out the offensive word.

And then asked him: “Are you happy now?”