The dog took me for a walk today.
And being fully aware that everything these days has to have an acronym, I’m KOSI.
That’s Kind Of Self Isolating.
The combination of age, COPD and compromised immune system forced me into it.
So the dog gets to bring me out.
I’m not desperately enthusiastic about being dragged around my the mutt.
But I’m not in complete isolation.
I’ll drive if Connie or Charlotte needs a lift. It’s one way of getting out of the house though I don’t get out of the car.
But I don’t go into shops. I sure as hell don’t go into pubs. And now, I’m going to stop going into cafes.
There are some who would call that paranoia.
But I’ve thought about it.
And I’ve asked advice from people who know better than I do..
The conclusion is the same, whether I come to it myself or I come to it armed with advice.
It’s simple. Don’t take risks.
It’s all very Teresa Mannion – who happens to be a friend.
Don’t take unnecessary risks.
It was good advice when she told people not to make unnecessary journeys.
I was never likely to dive off pier in Salthill or stroll along the promenade in a gale force wind.
But now, in an entirely different context, the whole thing about avoiding unnecessary risks is all but tattooed on my forehead.
I walk the dog or vice versa.
And that’s as exciting as life gets right now as I try to keep what health I have.
Since I’ve been ill I’ve made a few discoveries.
One relates to walking the dog.
And it’s this: Picking up dog poo is more intellectually stimulating than an awful lot of daytime television.
In fact, being in a coma is probably more intellectually stimulating than most daytime television.
Indeed, much of the schedule would put you off self-isolating.
The quiz shows are mind-numbing. The endless property shows seem kind of pointless if you’re not intending to buy property. And I really don’t understand how there can be so many cookery shows. I think a guide to takeaways might be more relevant.
Anyway, look at those listings above.
There’s TLC where you can watch Say Yes to the Dress followed by Say Yes to the Dress followed by Say Yes to the Dress.
Or something called Quest Red where you can watch Say Yes to the Dress Bridesmaid followed by…you’ve guessed! Three more of the same.
On CBS Reality, you can watch episode after episode of Judge Judy.
Or go over to CBS Drama and watch – the same. Judge Judy over and over.
And if you don’t like that, you can switch to Sky Crime and watch Speeders over and over again.
And I know we all loved Friends. But does Comedy Central really have to show five episodes in a row?
So what are those, like me, who have chosen to self-isolate to a greater or lesser degree, supposed to do?
- I can walk the dog.
But not everyone has a dog.
And I don’t expect the government to supply dogs to us all though it’s a nice thought.
What they should do it establish a tv channel showing only good programmes.
Really. It’s not hard.
Hill Street Blues. Haven’t seen that for a while.
Life on Mars. It was brilliant.
Cheers. Still funny.
The Rockford Files. I reckon it would be popular.
Budgie. Remember that one with Adam Faith?
Minder. Stands the test of time.
M*A*S*H*. A classic.
The Monkees. I’m serious. I know loads of people who’d love to see it again.
The Flintstones. Set in the stone age but ahead of its time.
And Quicksilver. Why? I think some (younger) people today would literally sit watching with mouths open as contestants played for 5p and a top prize of a tenner.
Put lot on and watch people enjoy self-isolation.
Or get them dogs.