Shingles: they really are a major pain in the, well, arm in my case

I’ve been missing from here again.

Sick once again.

Sick with something I recommend you never get.

Sick with something I had before, 31 years ago.

I call it FS.

The S is for Shingles. I’ll let you figure out what the F is for.

I’ve had a lot wrong with me over the years. Brokn bones, a bad back which needed surgery, lymphoma which required full body radiation which was like suburn on sunburn on sunburn.

But nothing comes close to FS, that is, Shingles, for pain.

Last time, it was around my stomach and I was in a hotel room in Hannover with a pillow in my mouth to stop anyone hearing my muffled screaming. This time, I’m at home and it’s the left arm.

Now, I don’t do GoogleDoc. (That’s what I call looking up symptoms on Google before asking an actual doctor.) I know people tend to log on to Google as a first resort, and enter their symptoms to find out what’s wrong with them.

You’ll get the right answer – along with ten others that will scare the shite out of you.

Symptom: “I’ve a pain in my right arm” GoogleDoc. “Might be a slight muscle strain. Or Leprosy.”

Symptom: “My stomach feels tight and I’m a bit nauseous.” GoogleDoc: “It’s indigestion. Or advanced terminal cancer.”

I knew I had Shingles. But the pain wouldn’t go away despite large (prescribed) doses of Oxynorm, Oxycontin and Lyrica.

So I gave in and looked it up.

First thing GoogleDoc tells me is the pain can last three weeks. THREE WEEKS!!!! Thanks for that.

But it has been known to last five weeks. FIVE WEEKS!!!!!!!! Louser.

I was just about to shut the computer down when I saw a question from a woman who got Shingles and still had pain, she said, after two years.

I may have to turn to cannabis to solve this one.

But I think I’ll try a decent Languedoc red first.

It mightn’t cure the Shingles.
But it will certainly ease the pain.

(You will note that I didn’t make you sick to your stomach with a photograph of someone’s Shingles. I can be nice sometimes!)